What Do We Tell Our Kids about Santa?

A BLOG by Shane Pruitt

What do we tell our kids about Santa?

As a pastor, I get asked this question often during the Christmas season.  “How should Christian parents approach the topic of Santa?” (Here is a great resource if you’re interested in the history of Santa Clause: http://www.history.com/topics/santa-claus)

Many Christian parents decide to jump in with both feet on the Santa fun, while others give the Santa topic a complete stiff-arm.  What I’ll do in this post is give the two most popular options, jot down a thought or two on each option, then tell you another option that we do with our children.  I am not at all saying that our option is the perfect way of doing things.  Every family has to pray, decide, and act upon the option that works best for them.  Here are just some things to consider. Ultimately, I believe that as Christian parents we are our children’s pastors. And that is a really, really big deal.

The Two Most Popular Santa Options:

Go “all-in” on the Santa Fun:  This can be and often is a lot of fun for both the parents and the children.  After all, you can use Good-Ole-Saint-Nick as a ‘ever-watching-eye’ for you to use as a tool to make your little ones “act right.”  For example, “You better stop doing that…  You don’t want to end up on the ‘naughty list’ do you?”  “You better go to sleep, or Santa isn’t going to come!”  You can play into the Santa stories, and often it makes us feel like children again ourselves.

However, as Christians, there are some things to consider here.  Our job as Christian parents is to teach our children from an early age that Jesus deserves the center of our attention.  He is supposed to be number one in all seasons!  Is it possible that we are helping to create an idol in the lives of our children?  After all, we’re helping them put more focus on Mr. Clause than on Jesus Christ.  Are we teaching them that Santa and his list is the ultimate judge when actually Jesus and the Book of Life is the True Judge?Often, by accident, we are more concerned about our children’s actions than we are about the state of their hearts.  It can be easy to create a consistent model by saying, “If Santa sees you ‘being good’, then you will get want you want.”  However, our goal as Christian parents should not be to create moralists, but rather to foster obedience to Jesus and His word as an act of worship in response to the gospel.  Last, but not least, one day they will find out that we’ve been lying to them for years.  Could we unintentionally be teaching our children that it is ok to lie as long as it is done in good fun?  If you’re “just playing along,” it is ok not to be truthful.  That could be a lesson that comes back to bite us in the rear end in their teenage years.  “Who taught you that is ‘ok’ and ‘fun’ not to be truthful?”  “Well, you did, mom and dad.”  In a interview with Brad Pitt (a father of six), he talked about discovering the real deal about the North Pole, and it was a “huge act of betrayal” for him as a little boy. He told E! News, “when I found out the truth, I was like ‘Why? Why? Why would you lie to me?”

Give Santa Clause the Stiff-Arm:  This option is to tell our children from the beginning that there is no such thing as Santa Clause, Rudolph, North Pole, etc.  You and your family avoid all things Santa:  movies, decorations, pictures, etc.  I’ve seen children comment at school, “I can’t color this picture of Santa because my parents don’t want me to associate with anything that has to do with that fake-red-fat-man!”

However, there are things to consider with this option.  In choosing this no-tolerance for Santa option you’re being truthful with your children.  I can see where this approach can be seen as very admirable.  If you choose this route for your children, I think there should be additional intentional teaching for them.  For example, they should be informed that other children’s parents think it is ok for their kids to believe in Santa.  Why is this important?  It’s not your six-year-old’s responsibility or role to tell all the other first-graders, “There is no such thing as Santa Clause, you dummies!”  Also, if we’re not careful, we can create a sense of pride and self-righteousness in our children that they know the truth while others do not.  Remember that we are our children’s pastors. They are ultimately our responsibility.  If this is the route you choose, disciple your kiddos to be serving, loving, patient, and understanding of the upbringing of others.  Don’t create and foster that kid in the class that ultimately grows up to be that adult in the church…a self-righteous legalist who does nothing but give the pastor an ulcer.

Another Option:

Santa is Like Cinderella:  This is the option that we choose for our family.  You can tell that we have girls.  We actually have two girls (ages seven and two), and a boy (age one).  Our son is still a little too young to know about Santa, so this is what we tell our girls:  Santa is like Cinderella.  He is not a real person, but he is fun to talk about, be entertained by, and see in art (movies, decorations, etc).  This option allows them to know the truth, and still participate in the fun.  They don’t have to sit out any activities at school, can still have their pictures with Santa, they can watch great movies (like the old Rudolph clay-mation), and see Santa decorations without being confused by them.

However, they still need to be sensitive of the others at school and church that have been told that Santa is real by their parents.  Once again, it’s not my child’s job to educate their peers about Santa. It is the parent’s job.  Also, I don’t want a parent-teacher meeting because my red-headed daughter traumatized all the boys by telling them that their hero is like Cinderella!

You may be thinking, “Who cares?  What is the big deal?”   God has given us the amazing and humbling task to be a steward of the next generation that ultimately belongs to Him.  We are pastors and disciple-makers to our children, so everything we do is a really, really big deal.  We should care a whole lot!

Whatever option best fits your family, just make sure that Jesus remains the number one focus.  Teach your children that He is the reason for the season.  That baby Jesus was the promised Son of God.  He grew into a man to die as a perfect man for mankind.  He was buried and came back to life three days later conquering sin, death, and the grave.  He showed Himself for forty-days, ascended into heaven, and one day He is coming back for His people!  He is our hope.  He is our peace. He is our joy.  He is our love!